Black Bean Sauce Pork Roast, Courtesy of Marti

I never figured out what to do with Black Bean and Garlic Sauce from a jar. I realize this is a travesty, because I am Asian and I should just know these things, but apparently I'm missing that gene that carries knowledge of Proper Black Bean Sauce usage. Thankfully, I got a tutorial from Marti - the lovely lady who made a dinner that was so inspiring that I got over a terrible absinthe-and-wine hangover and chowed down on 3 helpings as soon as I smelled it coming out of the oven.

Ingredients:

1 Picnic Shoulder (with fat)

1 jar Lee Kum Kee Black Bean & Garlic Sauce

1 cup rice

2 cloves chopped fresh garlic (optional)

salt & pepper to taste

Tools:

1 super sharp knife

1 roasting pan w/ metal rack to elevate roast

The best part about this roast is that it's pretty much assemble-and-forget, which is perfect for when you're nursing a hangover so bad that you actually woke up and puked and peed at the same time. The only thing you have to be careful about is paying attention during the first step so you don't slice yourself with the knife. First step: slice off the layer of fat from the picnic shoulder, leaving the fat sheet whole and intact - you will need it for later. Set the fat piece aside and make sure no hungry house pets make off with it, as it is tasty and crucial for the self-basting process. Next, take the jar of black bean and garlic sauce and liberally smear it all over the top of the roast where you removed the fat. Add the optional fresh garlic here if you wish. Replace the fat layer and place the roast on the rack in the pan. Pour a cup or so of water into the pan - do not fill it above the level to which the roast is elevated. Sprinkle a little salt and pepper on the surface of the roast, and put the roast in an oven that has been preheated to 350-375 degrees. Approximate a baking time using 30 minutes /lb as a guideline. During the last 30 minutes of baking time, pour the rice into the liquid that has pooled in the pan underneath the elevated roast, adding a little water into the pan if it is too dry. Return the rice and pork to the oven for the remaining time, then remove and let the shoulder sit for 15 minutes before carving and serving to all your other hung-over komrades. You will be heralded as a hero.